Chuck and Sarah vs The Lost Memories
by musingsofnobody
Summary: Now that everyone seems to be moving on with their lives, just how will Chuck and Sarah cope with their new reality? Post-series.
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! Wow. I can't believe I'll be writing in here again. But as you all know, our show just ended, and I'm not sure if I'm really satisfied with how they ended it. It was so...ambiguous. But anyway, I just needed to write this cos I think I'll lose my mind if I don't get this one out of my system. So..yeah. That's it.

Enjoy! and tell me what you think. ;)

I don't own Chuck, but I do own all the errors you'll find on this one.

Chuck and Sarah vs. The Lost Memories

**i**

It starts with a request. No, much like a gentle order.

"Kiss me."

He couldn't fully figure out the meaning behind her words at first. But once he does, he takes the leap, not knowing how it would affect them after it happens. He focuses on the fact that she trusted him just like he'd asked her to.

It starts out as a simple peck - like they were both testing the waters. It doesn't escalate to a heated-all-consuming kiss. He feels her holding back, but he doesn't want to think about that. It ends when she pulls back. They both open their eyes and the smile on his lips is mirrored on hers. Relief is the first thing he feels.

"Did it work?" He asks jokingly, but also hopeful.

For a second, it doesn't come to her what he's talking about. She's too absorbed and a little shocked in the familiarity of it all, yet her brain seems to think otherwise. She shakes her head and mutters a simple "I'm sorry" along with a small smile.

"Hey, don't be, it was definitely worth the try." He tries to be funny – even making a face – and it earns him a light laugh from her.

They fall silent, and they watch the waves come in and out. Finally, he speaks again. "Someone once told me that even if the brain forgets, the heart never will. It will always remember, Sarah."

His tone is hopeful, and somehow, she can feel the truth in his words. She doesn't say anything though. She just nods, and she sees him smile. He takes her hand and holds her gaze.

"I just want you to know, that I'll always be here for you. For better or for worse. Always." He gives it a slight squeeze towards the end, and she just nods. If it took her by surprise – any of it – she didn't let it show.

She is quite conflicted. Her brain says not to give in to what she's suddenly feeling, but her heart...her heart tells her to jump. When she notices him let go of her hand she felt as if something had been taken from her. She did not like the feeling. It was then that she makes her decision.

"I think I'm gonna stay in Burbank for a while." She's not sure if her intention is to tell him, or if it was herself she's telling it to, but whatever the reason is, the delight in his face cannot be hidden. It can easily be seen on the big smile he is now wearing.

Finally, she thinks, when they both leave the beach at the same time, in the battle of small voices occurring in her head, the voice of her heart won out this time.

**ii**

A few weeks had passed since that moment at the beach, and slowly, she's starting to remember bits and pieces of what was. It was all thanks to him - to Chuck - who had kept his promise that he'll always be someone she can call. He'd told her about their story, or what she gathers as the summary of it all; cos he keeps saying there's still so much to tell.

She had asked him for space and that is why she's back in what she remembers to be her old hotel room. Her phone rings, and it takes her about 2-3 rings before she picks up. It's Chuck. His name flashing on the screen brings a smile to her face.

"Hello?" She answers, waiting for his voice at the other end of the line.

"Hey, Sarah. It's Chuck." He starts off. "But you probably already knew that...so anyway, the reason really why I called is that..." He realizes he's babbling, and he'll torture himself for that after he gets his thoughts across.

"Chuck." Sarah says, and it stops him, like always.

"Right, right. Well, I was just wondering if you're doing anything for lunch?" He finally asks.

"I don't think so. Why?" Being the spy that she is - and a good one at that - she notices that it's already fast becoming a routine - him calling and asking her about her plans that is.

"Well I was just thinking about driving around town, maybe go to the beach, then pick up some lunch later. Do you want to come with?" When no answer immediately comes, he goes ahead with the babbling. "But if you don't want to, that's fine. I'm a grown man, I can leisure drive on my own."

"Chuck." She says again, and just like always, he stops. It takes her maybe a second or two to contemplate if she should go with him, but the man was just eager for an answer. So instead of thinking, she follows her instincts, her heart if you will.

"I'm sorry, I understand. I won't bother you-" but he was cut off by her voice.

"I'll come with you. One condition though." She tells him.

"Really? Great! Anything, what is it?" He asks, excitement obvious in his voice.

"I'm driving."

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><p>So? Is this something worth continuing? Will upload the next one after I get some feedback..hopefully. ;)<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I wish inspiration came this frequent! Ha! Enjoy! :)

**Chuck and Sarah vs. The Lost Memories**

**iii**

Their first stop is the beach. January air is not as cold in sunny California, yet Sarah finds herself a little too cold, not much to her liking. He notices and immediately gives her his jacket - he doesn't even offer it, he just drapes it around her shoulder.

"Thanks." She says, and can't help but smile.

He simply nods, giving her an equally bright smile and recalls the last time they were in the exact same spot, in the exact same position. It makes him feel a little lighter, better.

"Did we used to come here often?" He's quite surprised by her question. She doesn't meet his gaze. She's just staring out at the vast horizon, feeling the ocean breeze through her face.

Her words bring a certain ache in his heart. It's sounded like she is describing a life long gone, and in a way, it is...gone.

"No, not really." He answers, and his voice is calm. "The only time I remember being here with you was when we first met." He tells her, neither meeting each other's eyes.

She recalls what he said a few weeks ago, about her asking him to trust her. She smiles at the memory, and nods.

"And we didn't come here together that time. You...well, you actually just found me." He shares, and she can't help but notice the similarity of the story with what happened over some weeks ago.

"Of course you probably just tailed me that time, being the kickass-ninja-spy-girl that you are." He manages to joke, and he gets the laugh he was going for. The sun shines a little brighter, hotter, and they decide it's time to go.

"So what do you want for lunch?" She asks, as she drove them back to town.

"Well, I was actually thinking about drive-thru? Some cheeseburgers, extra pickles of course, and fries, lots of ketchup, coke, and then we can just drive around as we eat?" His tone is playful, but she doesn't notice.

He sees the horror in her eyes, the look of disbelief. In a matter of seconds, he cracks himself up.

"I'm kidding, baby." He tells her in between laughs, knowing how careful she is with her car - especially with the interior of her car - but she is quite caught up with the endearment, and with the cheeseburgers. She remembers how she liked her burgers. She doesn't let him notice though, and kept on driving.

"So that's who you are huh? A guy who makes fun of the girl who lost her memories? Claims to be her husband but makes fun or her anyway." She knows that is not the case, trying to hide a smile she kept her eyes straight on the road.

Chuck falls silent, and for a moment he spaces out. Sarah takes the freeway and an exit and he doesn't notice. He should've known better than to make fun of her and her Lotus, he thinks. When she realizes it takes him too long to give a reply, she finally laughs to herself.

"Relax, Chuck. I'm kidding." She says, and then flashes him a toothy smile. This gives him a smile of his own, then finally noticing they weren't on the right way back to town.

"Sarah, where are you taking us?" He asks, a little alarmed, suddenly mindful of his surroundings.

She shrugs, not taking her eyes off of the road. "You said you wanted to drive around? I'm sure there'll be some place up where we can get food." Even she is surprised by her actions. Since when did she start having spur of the moment ideas?

Noticing how empty the road is, he kind of doubts her idea. Of course, all freeways tend to be like that - nothing but sand and grass.

"Which exit did you take again?" He asks, kind if realizing where the freeway leads to. She gives him another shrug.

"Picked a random exit, but according to the GPS, this leads to-" But Chuck has already beaten her to it.

"Barstow." The look on his face is that of surprise. At the mention of the word, she pulls them over.

Flashes of what was started hitting her like a tidal wave. She was bombarded with memories - so vivid, she feels like her whole body will just instantaneously combust.

The first one is of her and Chuck, in a sleazy motel room. It wasn't how she pictured it when Chuck told her the story. Then it comes again, she's still half asleep when she felt him graze the back of her neck. Their hands were touching, his on top of hers.

Her heart rate seems to recall its beat during the memory. She tries to calm herself, but another wave comes.

He kisses her, fervently, passionately, until he's on top of her. She can see him trying to hold himself back, as if asking her if they should stop, but she initiates another kiss, and they were both...gone.

That's when she finally hears Chuck's voice. It is of worry, and panic altogether. "Sarah? Honey? What's happening? Are you alright?" She doesn't realize how long she spaced out, but Chuck had already unbuckled his seatbelt, gotten out of the car, and then to her side.

"Sarah! Can you hear me? What's happening?" His hand feels clammy on her cheek. She blinks once, twice, three times until she manages to give him a nod. He helps her out of the car. The sun is high, but the January is enough to make them feel cold.

She paces around, while he's left to just stare at her. She feels nauseous from the memory, and her heart hasn't slowed down. It's hard for her to breathe. Along with the memories came back strong, intense feelings. Suddenly, it all feels real to her - the love, and the life she used to have. She paces back towards him. Any moment now, she feels like she'll just vaporize in mid-air.

"What happened? Did you remember something?" Chuck asks as he approached her, running his hands on her arms - as if trying to calm her.

She takes a deep breath, like a last attempt to dismiss everything that she feels. And that's when she fails. The next thing she knows is that she's pulled him towards her, and their lips crash.

It takes him by surprise, and he really isn't sure if he should be doing this - kissing her - but he gives in anyway, because with the kiss, he remembers how exactly he felt back in Barstow.

The feeling of kissing his wife is an overwhelming feeling altogether. But he feels like Sarah is putting all years worth of pent up emotions on this one kiss, much like the way he's putting all his love for her in it.

His knees feel like they're going to betray him. As if knowing what he's thinking, she moves them a little backward so that she is supported by her car. It ends when one of them pulls back for air. Both weren't sure who it was. He's so dumbfounded that he doesn't even manage to ask her what it was that just happened before she spoke.

"I remember..." Her breathing is still ragged from the kiss they have shared. "Barstow...I remember, Chuck." He doesn't know how to react. Everything is happening too fast - what with her kissing him, then remembering. But mostly, he's just happy, his heart constricts - the good kind - and everything just feels so light, better, brighter.

Tears brim on his eyes out of joy. He sees a lone tear escaping her eye, and goes to wipe it away. "That's great baby, that's really, really great." He can't control the smile on his face that seems to be getting brighter each second that passed.

He hugs her and breathes in her scent, kisses her hair, and goes to hug her some more - tighter. "We're going to be okay, Sarah." He adds, as if assuring her that it is just the beginning of good things to come.

With his touch and his words, her heart calms. For the first time in weeks, she believes - really believes - that things will eventually fall back into place. She smiles a content smile as he wrapped his arms around her. "I know." She says, but only she can hear.

"This calls for a celebration, Sarah!" He exclaims, excitement evident in his voice. She can't help but smile. "So what do you say? Let's head back to Burbank and celebrate!"

As much as she liked the idea, she finds herself shaking her head no. Chuck is a little deflated with her answer. "I want to go to Barstow, Chuck." He is quite taken aback by her words. The motel is nowhere near luxurious, or glamorous, and if they weren't on the run then, there is no way he'd settle for that room, especially when it's her he's with.

"Are you sure?" He asks her, only wanting to know if it's what she really wants.

She closes her eyes for a second, and nods. "Yes, Chuck. I'm sure."

* * *

><p>It really helps when you review, you know? So go on, hit that button, and let me know what you have in mind. Til the next one!<p>

-A.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chuck and Sarah vs. The Lost Memories**

**Been Gone Long Enough**

**iv.**

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and for Chuck Bartowski, that's exactly the case. The last time he'd seen his wife was almost 3 months ago. He didn't expect Barstow (or that day) to turn out the way it did.

"This is it Sarah, it's nothing luxurious or glamorous, but it's special." He says as he opened the door to the room they had rented out a few years ago.

She had nothing to say for herself, because it wasn't the place she'd expected it to be - not that she had any expectations - but she felt the place was so special for it to look this way - dreary, old and nothing special at all.

And yet, when she looked at him sitting on the edge of the bed patting the space next to him, she couldn't help but think about what transpired in this very room. The idea overwhelms her, and before she even realizes it, she finds herself running out of the room.

He chases after her, worry evident in his face. He finds her sitting in her Lotus.

"I can't... I can't do this Chuck." She tells him when he decided to join her. It immediately breaks his heart, but he doesn't show her any sign. He gives her a slight nod and takes a deep breath.

"Do you want me to drive?" When she gave him a slight nod, they exchanged places. He dropped her off at her hotel room and caught a cab home.

He's brought out of his trance when he heard the voice of none other than Morgan Grimes.

"Any news?" He asks, and just like any morning for the last three months, Chuck shakes his head no.

"She'll come around soon enough. I mean, we are talking about THE Sarah Walker here afterall."

Chuck finds himself hoping Morgan Grimes is right. As if reading his mind, Morgan adds, "You know I'm right."

He offers his bestfriend a small smile. "Well, since you've yet to be, I think I'll get some work done at Castle for the time being." He says.

It has been three months since she'd left town, and left him - Chuck Bartowski.

She'd gone from mission to mission, country to country, and yet she couldn't shake the unbelievably huge feeling of emptiness within her, like she's not where she's supposed to be, doing something she's not meant to do. She remembers vividly the last time she saw him.

It was the night after they had visited Barstow, and although it was her idea in the first place, she couldn't help but regret it. Feelings scared her, however, strong feelings sent her running and packing.

She finds herself in the courtyard, one she's probably seen so many times but just couldn't remember. It's late, and he's probably asleep, but she knocks anyway.

He's already dressed in his pajamas, she probably woke him up.

"Sarah?" Her presence surprised him, almost hoping she's here to come back to him.

"Hey Chuck, can we talk?" She goes right to the point, and he invites her in.

"Do you want anything to drink? Coffee maybe?" He offers, and yet she shakes her head no.

"I came to say goodbye Chuck." She says, and his face pales.

"Goodbye? Where are you going?" He asks, and started to pace.

"Away. I just...I can't be here right now. And the longer I stay, the longer we'll hope that something big will happen, and I don't want to give all of you false hope, Chuck." She explains, each word getting harder to say.

He is, once again at a loss for words. He didn't know how to react to that, because honestly, Sarah was right. What if her memories don't come back? But then he realizes she's his Sarah, and she's still somewhere in there.

When she didn't hear any reply, she took it as her cue to leave. "Goodbye, Chuck." She hesitates at first, but then finds herself walking away.

Just as when she was already out at the courtyard, his hand finds hers. She looks up at him, and although it's a little dark out, she can see tears brimming in his eyes.

He holds her hand near his chest. She could almost feel the beating of his heart, fast and erratic, like hers.

"Do you feel that?" He says more than ask. She finds herself closing her eyes. "Sarah, this is my heart, and it will always, always belong to you."

She took in a deep breath as he entwined their fingers. He leans in and brushes his lips on hers. She finds herself deepening the kiss. She wanted so bad for the magic kiss to happen, but then, the moment ends.

"Chuck, I need to go." She says, and for a second, it was just raw pain and hurt that she saw in his eyes, then quickly changing to pure understanding and she dare say - love?

He finds himself nodding his head. A forced smile in his face - she can tell. "Can't blame your husband for trying, right?" She returns an awkward smile of her own.

When she starts to walk away, he asks "Will I ever see you again?" like a last attempt to make her stay, but it's probably too low, for she didn't answer.

"I hope so, Chuck." She says to herself, and walks away.

Her trip down memory lane was interrupted when a familiar face came into the room. It is of one Gen. Diane Beckman.

"Agent Walker, it's nice to see you again." She says as if really happy to see a familiar face, then motions for Sarah to take a seat.

"I understand that you are here for you mission orders, yes?" Sarah nods her head, and Beckman hands her a dossier.

"Alberto Guerrero, responsible for the breaches in our security firewalls. He hacks into any system and gets control over it. Recent intel say he's planning a fire sale. Your mission is to locate Guerrero, capture him, and prevent the fire sale."

Sarah is quite confused, why it was her that was picked. "I'm sorry general, but I believe hacking into systems isn't in one of my fortes."

"…Which is why we have a team to do that for you. They're one of the best, if not the best, so safe to say, you're in good hands Agent Walker."

Quite satisfied with the answer, she nods and prepares to take her leave.

"Other mission details will be discussed after you meet up with your team." Diane Beckman says with quite a devious smile, then hands her what she gathers as her travel itinerary.

"I'll see you on your next briefing Agent Walker."

Just as she was heading towards the door, she gets her biggest shock of the day.

She's going to Burbank.


End file.
